The Twin Flame Journey Continues
There are some topics that are so profound, so unbelievably powerful, that I’m slow to bring them up. If you’ve been following this blog, you probably know I talk about “out there topics”. Ranging from personal experiences with different types of beings, to ESP, to current events. Obviously some topics are more “out there” than others. However, when it comes to intensity, nothing is more profound than The Twin Flame Journey. I’ve only discussed the topic one other time. If you would like some background information, you can read my earlier post by clicking here.
In this post, I’m going to focus on the lessons I’ve learned from interacting with my twin, as well as the ups and downs of our journey thus far. The Twin Flame Journey is not for the faint of heart, and anyone who has met their true twin knows this. That being said, I’ve seen a lot of people posting online, that they’ve met their twin, and it has always been rainbows, sunshine, and unicorns prancing through divine bliss. When I read things like that, I want to puff up my face like Jiggly Puff, and double slap them into next week. Sorry bro, that probably isn’t your twin if that’s the case. They could be a different type of soulmate , but they’re not your twin in my opinion. A little Pokemon humor to break the ice :).
When We First Met….Again
I recognized my twin for the first time (in this life), during Thanksgiving dinner in 2016. I say “recognized”, because she would tell you that we actually met prior, as her and my cousin were close friends, and she had been to other family events. Although, due to our age difference we hadn’t engaged each other until this point.
In an instant, I went from cool and relaxed, to being completely in shock. I actually almost spit out my food, when she walked into the room. My heart rate increased, and I even got an instant head ache as my cousin re-introduced her to us.
No, I didn’t know what exactly was going on right away, but I did know that something significant had begun. This adorable little spitfire, with her beautifully elegant vibes and Dunk A Roo desert had managed to shatter my clam demeanor. Forcing me into a panic, as I was desperately trying to pretend I wasn’t curious about her.
Throughout the evening, my calm slowly returned, but I felt different. Usually I wasn’t a huge people person, I didn’t like to make small talk, and I always had my head in the clouds. Yet, she had been able to pull me out of the clouds, just by having a normal conversation and I loved that.
The Ups and Downs of Twins
It didn’t take long for us to each out to each other after Thanksgiving. In fact, she was on my mind a lot, after that evening. I couldn’t explain it, but something just kept telling me to talk to her.
Eventually, I sent her a message via a phone app, and she responded quickly, indicating she had been thinking about messaging me also. At this point I knew, there was a deep connection between us, and it didn’t take me long to realize we were twins.
The dynamic between us was nothing I ever experienced before, and as we talked I found I never had to hold anything back. I could tell her anything, and I wasn’t used to that.
Of course we butt heads also. We mirrored a lot of each other’s insecurities and wounds. As is the case with all Twins, thus the reason why the relationship is intense. Some twins can’t take this aspect of the connection, and they run from each other like a vampire from daylight.
It’s not easy, trust me, and my twin would agree 150%.
The Mirror Shows All
My twin has said more than once, that she thinks I’m the “good” twin and she’s the “bad” one. I’ve never agreed with that, we are each other. Whatever someone may think of one of us, they best be willing to think the same of the other as well.
My twin is wonderful, and I’m going to tell you why. She has never let me get away with anything, she makes me look at my insecurities. If she triggers me, I may get annoyed for a bit, but it never lasts.
We have argued many times, but the Twin love is always there. When we argue it’s usually because one of us has triggered the other. Resulting in the other having to deal with a wound, or at least having to look at it.
The truth of the matter is, there is going to be headbutting between twins. At times there is going to be a lot of headbutting. You’re going to get triggered and you’re going to want to lash out. When it first starting occurring with my twin and I, I’d often try and convince myself that she wasn’t really my twin. That she was just some random person, and I should just disregard her and move on. Yet, as soon as a thought like that crossed my mind, I knew I was lying to myself.
What frustrated me more was, the amount she would cross my mind, even when I was annoyed. Here I was so annoyed, and yet at night there was no one else I wanted to cuddle up to more. I couldn’t understand how it was possible, to be so annoyed with someone, yet secretly want to be staring into their eyes as I fell asleep. It was beyond confusing.
I’ve always been very insecure about psychical intimacy. I was an awkward kid growing up and suffered with a lot of anxiety, depression and OCD. So much so, that I was considered suicidal a number of times during my life. As such I never trusted anyone enough, to let them get overly close to me. Even when I could tell they wanted to.
The anxiety was so bad, that I would have constant thoughts of how undesirable I would be for anyone. If for some reason I did let a girl closer than normal, they would often use me for my emotional support and then disappear. This only made things worse for me. I don’t think I’ve even told my twin about the agony my soul was in during these periods.
As I got older I pulled myself together, but still had the underlying wound, and my twin would trigger me when she touched it. My twin is the opposite, in that she owns her sexuality very well. Something that originally terrified me, as listening to her talk about her experiences made me have to acknowledge my insecurity.
I would often lash out at her, saying that’s just “lust” or “gross”. She never bought it, and although she never said it directly, I could tell she was saying at times “Twin, you’re just afraid to admit you have these feelings too. It’s OK, you can tell me, I won’t judge you.”
Head In the Clouds:
Both my twin and I have a deeply Spiritual side. I’m probably more expressive about metaphysical topics, and probably do have more experience in that area. However my twin knows her stuff, but it’s much more of a private practice for her. She also, wont hesitate to let me know if I’m spending too much time with my head in the clouds.
In one classic example, I had been talking to her about the beauty of a flower. I believe it was Monks Hood, and in the middle of my bliss she called it the vagina plant. I immediately came down from my “high” when she said it. But it was funny, after I got over the initial shock.
Through interacting with my twin, I’ve also been able to acknowledge I can be pushy at times, and even can become a little jealous. While jealously is not a overly common thing for me, apparently my twin brings it out of me.
Often when my twin would be talking about her sexual experiences with others. I would find myself feeling inferior, or unworthy. At times I would push her away, because I would have thoughts like, “If they are so fun, why are you wasting your time with me”. It took me a long time, to realize how much my twin truly does love me, and she would never try and replace me. This is a hard lesson that I’m still working on.
What I’ve Tried To Show Her
While I could never tell you with 100% certainty, if I’ve been successful of not. I’ve tried my hardest to always show my twin how special she is. It’s not my place to discuss her insecurities, they are deeply private, as are mine (I didn’t mind sharing some of mine here).
My Twin often calls me “adorable and innocent”. That is true in many ways I suppose, but I am her and she is me. She’s just as adorable and innocent in my eyes. She is extremely special, and I have tried hard to show her how much she deserves. She deserves to be happy, in every aspect of her life. I once told her, If I had to choose between knowing the secrets of existence and seeing her smiling face. I would choose to see her smiling face every time.
She is worthy of everything her heart desires, and should never feel she isn’t a beautiful soul. As I’ve also told you twin, William Blake only saw Heaven in a wild flower, because you stayed out of the meadow that day.
Only For My Twin…..
Wherever the journey my take us, whatever lessons we may learn together, no matter how much you may frustrate me at times, nothing will ever get me to turn by back on you, I’ll always stand by your side. ALWAYS.
Every time I’ve argued with you, or pushed you away, or dismissed your opinion because it triggered me, it was out of fear. The fear of knowing how easily you could see through me. The fear of letting you too close, because I would have to admit I’d love it. The fear of you trying to control me, even though I know you never would. It was because of fear, that I would look for excuses to lash out.
I’m over the fear, done with it. I’ll still always tell you when I’m annoyed, but I’m not afraid anymore. My little “Red Team” spitfire, I surrender to our awesome twin connection, and look forward to experiencing how it will continue to unfold.
Twin love should always be unconditional, no matter how the relationship manifests in the physical. As they are you, you are them, forever and always will you be each other. The Twin Journey, is the final frontier.
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays everyone.
Merry Christmas to my wonderful Twin. Let your beautiful Soul continue to shine bright in 2021. I’ve never been more proud of you.